By Abdullah Usman Morai | Sweden

In the journey of life, the importance of relationships is immense for everyone, but some relationships that sometimes start with love, hope, and new dreams become a burden over time, losing their value and becoming toxic and painful. In such situations, where a relationship lacks respect and trust, divorce and separation can become a last resort. It is wrong to view it merely as the end of a relationship; in reality, it not only frees individuals from distress and sorrow but is also essential for their psychological and physical health. Ending a relationship that has become harmful to both parties can be a positive step that opens the door to peace and happiness in the future. To understand the importance of divorce, it is essential to take an impartial review of the social taboos, religious viewpoints, and their effects on human life.

Comparison of Western and South Asian Societies: The Effects of Social Taboos

The greatest purpose of divorce is to maintain a person’s psychological and physical health. In Western societies, divorce is mostly considered a personal decision, and there is little social pressure associated with it. There, the individual’s personal happiness and freedom are given priority. Over the past few decades, there has been an emphasis on individual rights and psychological well-being in Western societies. As a result, divorce has become an act that is not questioned much. However, in South Asian societies like Pakistan, India, and Bangladesh, divorce is still viewed as a major social taboo. Here, divorce is seen as a stain on the family’s honor or a social failure. Due to this mindset, many women and men are forced to live in unhappy, unfavorable, violent, and toxic relationships. This social pressure, shame, and fear lead people to suffer from many psychological problems, including depression, mental stress, and inner loneliness. In these societies, especially women are taught the lesson to “bear everything” and “avoid breaking the relationship.” Such thinking destroys a woman’s self-confidence and personality. Similarly, men also continue to endure such poisonous relationships due to social compulsions.

Religious Perspective: The Reality of Divorce in Islam

Religion, especially Islam, does not consider divorce a favorable act, but it is permitted. A well-known Hadith states that “Among the things that are lawful but disliked by Allah is divorce.” This means that divorce is a last and compelled resort when all other avenues are closed. In Islam, the concept of divorce exists in a situation where a husband and wife are unable to maintain their relationship and cannot live together peacefully. The Holy Quran and Hadith contain clear instructions regarding divorce, stating that this act should be based on justice, tranquility, and humanity. Islam grants the right of divorce not only to men but also to women, which is called Khula. It gives a woman the option to gain freedom from a relationship in which she is not happy. This proves that religion prioritizes the sustainability of relationships, but does not permit making human life meaningless in a dead-end street. Unfortunately, in South Asian societies, this flexible principle of religion has been linked with social and cultural traditions, and divorce has been declared a great sin.

Effect on Children: More Damaging than a Toxic Environment

It is a common misconception that divorce is always harmful to children. Research has proven that children who live in an environment of daily domestic disputes, psychological abuse, and toxicity are negatively affected. In such an environment, the mental, physical, and emotional growth of children is stunted. In contrast, it is better for parents to live separate and peaceful lives so that children can grow up in a healthy psychological environment. In a situation where parents live in separate but peaceful homes, they can raise children better. The children will feel that their parents are happy and that both care for them, which is a great blessing for their psychological health.

Why is Divorce Better than Staying in Toxic Relationships?

Staying in a toxic or unhealthy relationship makes a person mentally, physically, and emotionally weak. Such relationships involve constant tension, loss of self-respect, and a persistent feeling of fear. This kind of environment turns a person’s life into hell and destroys their abilities. Continuous mental stress increases the risk of depression, anxiety, and other physical illnesses. In contrast, divorce gives a person the opportunity to escape from such a toxic relationship and create a peaceful and safe environment for themselves. This allows them to restore their psychological, emotional, and physical health. Divorce is not the end of life, but freedom from a painful journey. It not only gives the individual an opportunity to start a new life but also helps them rediscover their personal strength and self-confidence.

The main purpose of this article is that divorce or separation gives a person the opportunity to live a healthy life instead of staying in a toxic environment, to gain control over their life, achieve autonomy, and live a healthy life. Staying in toxic relationships harms a person’s spiritual, emotional, and physical well-being, whereas separating opens the doors to new beginnings and mental peace.

South Asian societies should understand that the true honor of a family is not in maintaining a relationship, but in ensuring that every individual is happy and healthy. Divorce does not mean success or failure, but it is a part of the journey of self-confidence, self-love, and personal peace.

Despite the pressure of society and culture, leaving a toxic relationship for one’s own well-being and psychological health is a positive, constructive, and necessary decision. However, divorce is a very serious decision that should be taken with caution and understanding, but if necessary, a person should get rid of toxic relationships and live his or her life.

Read: Role of Women in Rural Sindh

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Abdullah Soomro, penname Abdullah Usman Morai, hailing from Moro town of Sindh, province of Pakistan, is based in Stockholm Sweden. Currently he is working as Groundwater Engineer in Stockholm Sweden. He did BE (Agriculture) from Sindh Agriculture University Tando Jam and MSc water systems technology from KTH Stockholm Sweden as well as MSc Management from Stockholm University. Beside this he also did masters in journalism and economics from Shah Abdul Latif University Khairpur Mirs, Sindh. He is author of a travelogue book named ‘Musafatoon’. His second book is in process. He writes articles from time to time. A frequent traveler, he also does podcast on YouTube with channel name: VASJE Podcast.

The post Understanding the Divorce and Separation first appeared on Sindh Courier.

By Abdullah Usman Morai

In the world of finance, a loan is a sum of money borrowed with the expectation of repayment, usually with interest when taken from banks or financial institutions. However, when it comes to personal relationships, particularly friendships, loans often function differently. They are usually informal, based on trust, and, more often than not, interest-free. But as many have learned the hard way, lending money to friends can be a double-edged sword, fraught with emotional and financial risks.

This article is based on true events, some of which will be highlighted throughout the article, where friends and acquaintances borrowed money for personal reasons—from medical emergencies to starting businesses—and then gradually disappeared, leaving lenders not just financially hurt but emotionally betrayed.

Why Do People Take Loans from Friends?

There are several reasons why individuals choose to borrow money from friends instead of approaching banks or lenders. The primary reason is convenience. Financial institutions have strict lending criteria, including credit checks, collateral, and paperwork, whereas friends offer money with fewer formalities. Additionally, loans from friends are usually interest-free, making them a more attractive option.

Another reason is urgency. Banks may take days or weeks to approve loans, but a friend can offer instant financial support without cumbersome processes. Some people also feel embarrassed about their financial situation and find it easier to discuss their struggles with a trusted friend rather than a formal lender. Borrowing from a friend also eliminates the fear of legal repercussions, which often accompany missed payments to financial institutions.

Real-Life Examples: The Hidden Truth behind Friendly Loans

1. Medical Emergencies

One friend borrowed a substantial amount during a medical crisis involving a family member. The lender understood the urgency and helped immediately. But after the crisis was over, the borrower never brought up repayment and gradually distanced themselves.

A long-time friend urgently needed money for his mother’s surgery. A group of friends immediately contributed, trusting his promise to return the money once his situation stabilized. But once the crisis passed, he slowly distanced himself, eventually vanishing without ever acknowledging the debt again.

2. School Fees for Children

A single mother borrowed money from her close friend, saying it was for her daughter’s school fees. The friend gave her the amount without hesitation. Months passed, and when the lender asked about repayment, the borrower accused her of being insensitive. Their friendship ended bitterly.

Another borrowed money to pay for their child’s school fees, claiming emotional distress, and promising a quick return. Months passed, and while school resumed, the lender never saw a single rupee returned.

3. Food and Basic Necessities

A neighbor, who often joined friendly gatherings, shared that he had no money to feed his family. Touched by his honesty, one friend handed over a decent sum. Weeks later, the borrower was spotted shopping luxuriously, pretending nothing had ever happened. When asked about the money, he acted surprised and walked away.

Some asked for help simply to buy food or cover monthly expenses. These were smaller amounts, but frequent. Over time, they added up. The borrower, meanwhile, continued to maintain an active social life, as seen on their social media.

4. Home Renovation

A friend asked for help to repair his leaky roof during the rainy season. He painted a picture of urgency and despair. After receiving the money, he did renovate—but not just his roof. He upgraded his kitchen and bought new furniture. He never returned the loan, claiming he was still recovering financially.

A friend borrowed for house repairs, which they insisted were urgent. Later, their renovated home became the backdrop of many Instagram posts, while the lender’s messages about repayment remained unanswered.

5. Wedding at home

A man borrowed money from three of his friends, saying it was to arrange his younger sister’s wedding. They supported him generously. Post-wedding, he threw a lavish celebration but avoided the very friends who helped him. When approached, he said, “You should’ve helped me without expectations.”

One borrowed to help marry off a daughter. The lender empathized with the cultural and financial pressure. The wedding was beautiful, but the loan became a forgotten detail afterward.

6. To Start a Business

A budding entrepreneur borrowed money from his closest friend, claiming he needed it to start a food delivery venture. He was passionate and convincing. After receiving the loan, he disappeared—deleting social media, changing his phone number, and vanishing from their shared group of friends.

Perhaps the most frustrating are loans given to help start a business. These often involve larger sums and big promises of future returns. Once the business is running, some borrowers act as if the lender was never part of the journey.

7. Debt Repayment

A friend in a tough spot asked for help to repay a moneylender threatening his family. The lender friend, fearing for his safety, gave him money without hesitation. Later, it was revealed that the story was fabricated, and the borrower had a history of making up dramatic tales to get easy cash.

The Social Media Sting: The most painful part for many lenders is seeing their borrowers enjoy vacations, shopping, and fine dining on social media while ignoring messages about repayment. It’s not just about the money—it’s the blatant disregard and disrespect.

Why Don’t People Pay Back Loans Taken from Friends?

While every borrower has their own circumstances, a consistent set of behaviors and mindsets emerges when friends fail to repay personal loans. At the heart of this issue lies a mix of emotional avoidance, entitlement, and lack of accountability. Several factors contribute to this unfortunate reality:

1. Lack of Formal Agreement: Since loans between friends are typically verbal, there’s no legal obligation to pay the money back, making it easier to ignore.
2. Financial Struggles: Borrowers might genuinely be unable to repay due to ongoing financial issues and keep postponing repayment.
3. Forgetfulness or Avoidance: Some borrowers may claim they forgot, while others deliberately avoid discussing the debt to escape repayment.
4. Taking Advantage of Friendship: Some people exploit friendships, assuming that since there’s no interest or legal contract, the lender won’t press for repayment aggressively.
5. Change in Relationship Dynamics: If the friendship deteriorates over time, the borrower may no longer feel obligated to repay the money.
6. No Set Deadline or Prioritizing Lifestyle Over Responsibility Without a specific repayment timeline, some borrowers treat the loan as a gift rather than a debt, leading to indefinite delays. The borrower is often seen spending money online, which proves they could repay if they chose to.

If Friends Don’t Pay You Back, Your Money is Gone—So is Your Friendship. What Should You Do?

If a friend doesn’t repay a loan, it puts the lender in a difficult position. Should they ask for the money back and risk the friendship, or let it go and bear the financial loss? Here are some possible courses of action:

1. Communicate Clearly: Politely remind them about the loan. A simple, non-confrontational conversation can resolve the issue.
2. Be Firm but Respectful: If the borrower keeps delaying, express that the repayment is important to you.
3. Set Up a Payment Plan: If the borrower cannot pay the full amount at once, suggest paying in smaller installments.
4. Accept the Loss and Move On: If the amount is small and the borrower refuses to pay, it may be better to move on rather than create unnecessary tension.

The True Loss: More than Just Money

The deepest wound isn’t financial—it’s emotional. The borrower didn’t just take your money; they damaged your trust. They treated your kindness as weakness. It forces you to question the value of the relationship and leaves lasting scars. You lose your peace, your faith in friendship, and sometimes, even your own willingness to help again.

Can One Forget That They Have Taken a Loan, or Do They Pretend?

It is possible for someone to genuinely forget a small loan, especially if it was given in a casual setting. However, in most cases, people do not forget—they choose to ignore the loan. The borrower may remember but pretend to have forgotten, hoping that the lender will never bring it up again. Some may even expect the lender to write off the debt as a gesture of goodwill.

Is It Good or Bad to Give a Loan to Friends?

Lending money to friends is neither entirely good nor entirely bad—it depends on the circumstances and the people involved. If your friend is trustworthy and has a history of repaying debts, lending money may not be a risky decision. Helping a friend in need can strengthen bonds and foster goodwill.

However, if the friend is financially irresponsible or has previously failed to pay back loans, lending money can damage both your finances and your friendship. The biggest risk is that, if they fail to repay, you may lose both the money and the friendship, leading to resentment.

It is always advisable to assess whether you can afford to lose the money before lending it. If the loan is substantial and you cannot risk losing it, then it may be best to politely refuse or offer an alternative form of support.

Is It Better to Lose Friends Instead of Money or Both?

The answer depends on the importance of the friendship and the amount of money involved. If a friend refuses to pay back despite multiple reminders, it may indicate that they do not value the relationship as much as you do. In such cases, losing a friend may not be a great loss, as they have already proven themselves unreliable.

However, if you value the friendship more than the money, it might be better to forgive the debt and preserve the relationship. It is essential to weigh the importance of financial stability against emotional bonds and act accordingly.

Final Thoughts

Lending money to friends is an act of kindness, but it must be done with caution. The emotional strain that comes from an unpaid loan can often be more damaging than the financial loss itself. If you choose to lend money to a friend, it is wise to do so with clear terms, such as setting a repayment deadline and putting the agreement in writing, even if informally.

It is also important to prepare for the worst-case scenario. Before lending, ask yourself: Can I afford to lose this money? If the answer is no, reconsider your decision. Instead, offer alternative ways to support your friend, such as helping them find financial resources or guiding them toward better money management.

Ultimately, money should never take precedence over trust and mutual respect in friendships. However, if someone repeatedly exploits your generosity, it may be a sign that the friendship itself is not built on mutual values. In such cases, it is better to learn the lesson, move on, and be more cautious in the future. Financial responsibility is an individual trait, and sometimes, the best way to preserve both your friendship and financial well-being is to say no in the first place.

Read: The Power and Purpose of Minimalism

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Abdullah Soomro, penname Abdullah Usman Morai, hailing from Moro town of Sindh, province of Pakistan, is based in Stockholm Sweden. Currently he is working as Groundwater Engineer in Stockholm Sweden. He did BE (Agriculture) from Sindh Agriculture University Tando Jam and MSc water systems technology from KTH Stockholm Sweden as well as MSc Management from Stockholm University. Beside this he also did masters in journalism and economics from Shah Abdul Latif University Khairpur Mirs, Sindh. He is author of a travelogue book named ‘Musafatoon’. His second book is in process. He writes articles from time to time. A frequent traveler, he also does podcast on YouTube with channel name: VASJE Podcast.

The post The Complexity of Loans between Friends first appeared on Sindh Courier.

• The article offers an in-depth exploration of the alarming rise in suicide rates in the modern era, blending both emotional insight and research-based context.
• It reflects on the silent struggles many face today, amplified by digital culture, societal expectations, and a lack of open discourse around mental health.
• The article also includes a compelling real-life case study to humanize the crisis and emphasize the urgent need for awareness and collective action.

Sawera Nadeem

In today’s fast-paced and hyper connected world, suicide has emerged as a silent epidemic — a grim indicator of the deep psychological toll the modern era is taking on individuals across all age groups. Once a taboo topic spoken of in hushed tones, suicide has now forced its way into public discourse through alarming statistics, heartbreaking stories, and the overwhelming burden placed on mental health systems globally. Behind each number lies a story, a life, and a network of shattered hearts, left to grapple with the unanswerable question: why?

The pressures of modern life are unlike any in human history. From academic stress and career competition to economic instability, family pressures, and social isolation, individuals today are constantly navigating a labyrinth of expectations and emotional strain. The pursuit of perfection, driven by societal ideals and often amplified by the curated realities of social media, has created a distorted view of success and happiness. Many are led to believe that everyone else is thriving, while they alone are struggling — a perception that breeds hopelessness and despair.

This sense of loneliness and comparison is particularly intensified in the digital age. Social media, while a tool for connection, often serves as a double-edged sword. The constant influx of filtered lives and unattainable beauty standards creates a toxic environment that can exacerbate feelings of inadequacy and alienation. Young people, especially adolescents and early adults, find themselves in a constant cycle of validation-seeking, where self-worth becomes tied to likes, comments, and followers. The result is a dangerous cocktail of anxiety, depression, and in extreme cases, suicidal ideation.

Beyond surface-level triggers, the root causes of suicide are deeply complex, often involving a combination of biological, psychological, and environmental factors. Mental illnesses such as depression, bipolar disorder, and schizophrenia are major contributors, yet access to adequate treatment remains limited, particularly in low- and middle-income countries. Moreover, the societal stigma surrounding mental health continues to deter individuals from seeking help, fearing judgment or being labeled as weak.

Read: Schedule Caste People commit more suicides than others in Sindh

While we attempt to generalize the issue through data and reports, it is individual stories that truly illuminate the human cost. Consider the case of Zainab, a bright 22-year-old university student from Karachi, who appeared cheerful and driven to everyone around her. Unknown to most, Zainab had been silently battling depression for years, triggered by unresolved childhood trauma and the immense pressure to excel in her studies. Her online presence was filled with smiles, inspirational quotes, and pictures with friends nothing to indicate the storm inside. Tragically, in early 2024, Zainab ended her life, leaving behind a grieving family and a university community in shock. Her story is a painful reminder that outward appearances can be deceiving, and that suicide often occurs in silence, behind closed doors.

The rise in such cases has prompted urgent calls for action. Governments, educational institutions, and communities are beginning to recognize the need for mental health awareness and suicide prevention programs. Schools are integrating counseling services, awareness campaigns are breaking stigma, and mental health hotlines are becoming more visible. Yet, the pace of change is slow, and for many, help still comes too late.

To reverse this trend, we must foster a culture of empathy, openness, and psychological safety. Families must be educated on the signs of mental distress; schools and workplaces must prioritize emotional well-being alongside performance. Importantly, individuals must feel empowered to speak up to say “I’m not okay” without fear of judgment.

In conclusion, the increasing suicide rate in the modern era is not merely a statistic — it is a reflection of a deeper societal and emotional crisis. It is a cry for help that can no longer be ignored. Through understanding, education, and genuine human connection, we have the power to make a difference to listen more, judge less, and stand as a beacon of hope for those lost in the darkness.

Read: Drug Addiction Among Youth: A Growing Crisis

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Sawera Nadeem, based in Karachi, is a Mass Communication student with a passion for research-based writing.  She focuses on topics that highlight public interest and social impact.

The post Disconnected in the Age of Connection first appeared on Sindh Courier.

Dr. Muhammad Shahban Sahito

In the sprawling landscape of Pakistani politics, Sindh province has been grappling with a complex array of issues that seem to have been drowned out in the cacophony of the national discourse. While media outlets are brimming with news and debates on politics, Sindh’s predicaments often find themselves relegated to the background. The province has long been ensnared in a web of socio-economic crises, with its populace facing impoverished conditions that have only worsened over time.

It often feels as though the province is being ruled like a colony rather than an integral part of the nation

A notable feature of Sindh’s political landscape is the unchallenged dominance of the Pakistan People’s Party (PPP) for a staggering half-century. However, this extended tenure in power has done little to address the fundamental social problems that have burdened the province. The common people of Sindh continue to endure the heavy weight of poverty, with livelihoods lost and a haunting sense of displacement forcing many to abandon the homes they have known for generations. The social and economic fabric of the province is unraveling at an alarming pace, driven by instability in economic resources that has led to an increase in populations resorting to a nomadic lifestyle, with children often reduced to begging.

At times, the very notion of Sindh’s integration within the Pakistani state is challenged by the province’s predicament. It often feels as though the province is being ruled like a colony rather than an integral part of the nation. Central government manipulation of politics and bureaucracy exacerbates this sense of detachment. Despite the PPP’s fifty-year reign, the province continues to grapple with issues related to governance, lawlessness, corruption, and law and order. Regrettably, Sindh has earned the dubious distinction of being one of the most corrupt regions in the country, with the institutions meant for accountability having crumbled under the weight of ineffective governance. The ordinary citizens of Sindh find themselves at the mercy of an incompetent bureaucracy under the PPP-led government of Asif Ali Zardari.

A notable feature of Sindh’s political landscape is the unchallenged dominance of the Pakistan People’s Party for a staggering half-century. However, this extended tenure in power has done little to address the fundamental social problems that have burdened the province

The people of Sindh had hoped for substantial reforms in critical sectors such as education, health, administration, and bureaucracy. However, the three consecutive terms of PPP governance failed to deliver any meaningful changes in these areas. The introduction of social programs in education, healthcare, irrigation, and poverty alleviation yielded minimal results, leaving poverty levels to rise and millions of children excluded from educational opportunities. The education sector’s inadequacies are underscored by improper teacher recruitment and insufficient training for those appointed, resulting in a compromised learning experience for students.

While the PPP government boasts of revolutionizing healthcare in the

province, rampant corruption continues to plague the sector. The influence of political appointments taints the administration and management of healthcare, hindering the sector’s performance and reform. Despite substantial foreign aid, the impact on the ground remains minimal. Health issues and diseases continue to thrive in many areas of the province, with malnutrition, smallpox, and measles claiming the lives of thousands of children annually. The healthcare system remains woefully unequipped to handle emergencies.

While the PPP government boasts of revolutionizing healthcare in the province, rampant corruption continues to plague the sector

Sindh’s social fabric is being torn asunder by rampant lawlessness and a deeply polarized society stemming from poor governance. The province has grappled with high crime rates for decades, wreaking havoc on societal security. The pervasive sense of insecurity has triggered an exodus from rural areas to urban centers. However, the urban landscape presents its own challenges, as different forms of dominance and control, ranging from tribal to feudal dynamics, to mafias, cast a shadow over daily life. These powerful entities control businesses, engage in corruption, and contribute to an environment of lawlessness, often with tacit support from the government.

Over the past fifteen years, the PPP government’s performance has arguably been more damaging than the era of General Zia. Despite public discontent and widespread suffering, the party, under Zardari’s leadership, maintains an unyielding grip on power. Recent local body elections witnessed the PPP securing resounding victories across the province, raising concerns about the state of democracy. The absence of a robust opposition further cements the PPP’s dominance, with the party expected to clinch victory in the forthcoming 2023 elections. This scenario raises questions about the true nature of democratic representation within the province.

Over the past fifteen years, the PPP government’s performance has arguably been more damaging than the era of General Zia

The prevailing perception is that Sindh’s fate has been effectively leased out to Zardari’s leadership. The lack of a potent opposition capable of challenging the PPP’s stronghold further cements this narrative. In Karachi, for instance, the election results saw the Jamaat-e-Islami emerge as the second-largest party. However, last-minute changes in the mayor’s election saw the PPP successfully installing its candidate, Murtaza Wahab. Such political maneuvers only solidify the notion that the PPP serves as an instrument of the federal government to advance its projects.

Also read: LOCAL GOVERNMENTS WITHOUT GOVERNANCE IN SINDH

Examining the PPP’s performance over the past fifteen years, a disconcerting pattern emerges. Thousands of acres of land in Sindh have been leased out by the party, while control over the province’s islands and natural resources has been compromised. Taxes earmarked for the province have been allocated to the federal government, casting doubt on the PPP’s claims of championing the 18th amendment.

Can Sindh shake off the impression that it’s treated as a colony within Pakistan, and move towards a future where the needs and aspirations of its people are genuinely addressed?

In light of this grim reality, the people of Sindh find themselves caught in a seemingly unending cycle of suffering, exacerbated by PPP’s compromise with powerful federal institutions. This alliance serves to keep the PPP in power, while opposition politics and civil society struggles to gain a foothold, leaving governance and progress stagnant. As the province and its citizens yearn for security and a sense of belonging, the question remains: Can Sindh shake off the impression that it’s treated as a colony within Pakistan, and move towards a future where the needs and aspirations of its people are genuinely addressed?

Also read: PROVINCIAL ADMINISTRATIVE CRISIS IN SINDH: CASE STUDY OF GENERAL PERVEZ MUSHARRAF ERA

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Dr. Muhammad Shahban Sahito is Assistant Professor at Department of International Relations, University of Sindh, Jamshoro. Email address: shahban.sahito@usindh.edu.pk

The post Sindh’s Persistent Struggle: Governance Challenges and Hopes for Progress first appeared on Sindh Courier.