Divorce is a very serious decision that should be taken with caution and understanding, but if necessary, a person should get rid of toxic relationships and live his or her life.
By Abdullah Usman Morai | Sweden
In the journey of life, the importance of relationships is immense for everyone, but some relationships that sometimes start with love, hope, and new dreams become a burden over time, losing their value and becoming toxic and painful. In such situations, where a relationship lacks respect and trust, divorce and separation can become a last resort. It is wrong to view it merely as the end of a relationship; in reality, it not only frees individuals from distress and sorrow but is also essential for their psychological and physical health. Ending a relationship that has become harmful to both parties can be a positive step that opens the door to peace and happiness in the future. To understand the importance of divorce, it is essential to take an impartial review of the social taboos, religious viewpoints, and their effects on human life.
Comparison of Western and South Asian Societies: The Effects of Social Taboos
The greatest purpose of divorce is to maintain a person’s psychological and physical health. In Western societies, divorce is mostly considered a personal decision, and there is little social pressure associated with it. There, the individual’s personal happiness and freedom are given priority. Over the past few decades, there has been an emphasis on individual rights and psychological well-being in Western societies. As a result, divorce has become an act that is not questioned much. However, in South Asian societies like Pakistan, India, and Bangladesh, divorce is still viewed as a major social taboo. Here, divorce is seen as a stain on the family’s honor or a social failure. Due to this mindset, many women and men are forced to live in unhappy, unfavorable, violent, and toxic relationships. This social pressure, shame, and fear lead people to suffer from many psychological problems, including depression, mental stress, and inner loneliness. In these societies, especially women are taught the lesson to “bear everything” and “avoid breaking the relationship.” Such thinking destroys a woman’s self-confidence and personality. Similarly, men also continue to endure such poisonous relationships due to social compulsions.
Religious Perspective: The Reality of Divorce in Islam
Religion, especially Islam, does not consider divorce a favorable act, but it is permitted. A well-known Hadith states that “Among the things that are lawful but disliked by Allah is divorce.” This means that divorce is a last and compelled resort when all other avenues are closed. In Islam, the concept of divorce exists in a situation where a husband and wife are unable to maintain their relationship and cannot live together peacefully. The Holy Quran and Hadith contain clear instructions regarding divorce, stating that this act should be based on justice, tranquility, and humanity. Islam grants the right of divorce not only to men but also to women, which is called Khula. It gives a woman the option to gain freedom from a relationship in which she is not happy. This proves that religion prioritizes the sustainability of relationships, but does not permit making human life meaningless in a dead-end street. Unfortunately, in South Asian societies, this flexible principle of religion has been linked with social and cultural traditions, and divorce has been declared a great sin.
Effect on Children: More Damaging than a Toxic Environment
It is a common misconception that divorce is always harmful to children. Research has proven that children who live in an environment of daily domestic disputes, psychological abuse, and toxicity are negatively affected. In such an environment, the mental, physical, and emotional growth of children is stunted. In contrast, it is better for parents to live separate and peaceful lives so that children can grow up in a healthy psychological environment. In a situation where parents live in separate but peaceful homes, they can raise children better. The children will feel that their parents are happy and that both care for them, which is a great blessing for their psychological health.
Why is Divorce Better than Staying in Toxic Relationships?
Staying in a toxic or unhealthy relationship makes a person mentally, physically, and emotionally weak. Such relationships involve constant tension, loss of self-respect, and a persistent feeling of fear. This kind of environment turns a person’s life into hell and destroys their abilities. Continuous mental stress increases the risk of depression, anxiety, and other physical illnesses. In contrast, divorce gives a person the opportunity to escape from such a toxic relationship and create a peaceful and safe environment for themselves. This allows them to restore their psychological, emotional, and physical health. Divorce is not the end of life, but freedom from a painful journey. It not only gives the individual an opportunity to start a new life but also helps them rediscover their personal strength and self-confidence.
The main purpose of this article is that divorce or separation gives a person the opportunity to live a healthy life instead of staying in a toxic environment, to gain control over their life, achieve autonomy, and live a healthy life. Staying in toxic relationships harms a person’s spiritual, emotional, and physical well-being, whereas separating opens the doors to new beginnings and mental peace.
South Asian societies should understand that the true honor of a family is not in maintaining a relationship, but in ensuring that every individual is happy and healthy. Divorce does not mean success or failure, but it is a part of the journey of self-confidence, self-love, and personal peace.
Despite the pressure of society and culture, leaving a toxic relationship for one’s own well-being and psychological health is a positive, constructive, and necessary decision. However, divorce is a very serious decision that should be taken with caution and understanding, but if necessary, a person should get rid of toxic relationships and live his or her life.
Read: Role of Women in Rural Sindh
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Abdullah Soomro, penname Abdullah Usman Morai, hailing from Moro town of Sindh, province of Pakistan, is based in Stockholm Sweden. Currently he is working as Groundwater Engineer in Stockholm Sweden. He did BE (Agriculture) from Sindh Agriculture University Tando Jam and MSc water systems technology from KTH Stockholm Sweden as well as MSc Management from Stockholm University. Beside this he also did masters in journalism and economics from Shah Abdul Latif University Khairpur Mirs, Sindh. He is author of a travelogue book named ‘Musafatoon’. His second book is in process. He writes articles from time to time. A frequent traveler, he also does podcast on YouTube with channel name: VASJE Podcast.
